It turns out I'm the heartless one in the family. I'm the one who laughs and wants to get the camera when my has his head stuck between the banister rails. I'm the one who will take the candy from the crying baby if he's getting it on the carpet. And I'm the one who can stomach swimming lessons.
My husband? Not so much. He's a softie. Johnny started swimming lessons a couple of weeks ago and he is, shall we say, not really a fan. He loves water, pools, baths, etc. But he likes them on his own terms. Also, in the last few months he's decided he is not fond being held or handled by anyone who is not me, his dad, his daycare teacher, or a grandma. So, I informed my husband he'd have to take Johnny to his first swimming lesson because I was busy, a couple of weeks ago, and he agreed. And then, he came home and said NEVER. AGAIN.
Apparently our little angel screamed as if he were being drawn and quartered.
And, true to form, I laughed. What is wrong with me?
Since then, I have borne all swimming lesson responsibilities. I have coaxed, coddled, made deals, promised rewards for non-crying, good behavior. And my kid has gone rigid and screamed every time he sees LAC's pool in the distance. And, I secretly hide my face and laugh. My husband's response to Johnny's shrieking during swimming lessons was to want to snatch him out of the water and run away with him. Mine is to turn my head away and stifle a chuckle.
It's not that I like to see him cry, and it's not that it take pleasure in his discomfort. It's just that, well, it's funny. I mean, I know he's not in any danger, and I know how important swimming lessons are, and I think toddlers are just funny anyway. He's irrational about it, and I can't help but chuckle when he arises from the water, snot everywhere, arms outstretched as if he's being sent to live with an evil aunt. He's so dramatic, I have to give him credit. It's quite a show for a fifteen minute swimming lesson wherein I am standing never more than five feet away from him, cheering and clapping like an idiot.
unhappy swimmer by meganstuke
So, I guess I am the designated swimming lessons taxi. I've been the vaccination taxi (not that I so much laugh at that one), the food nazi, and yes, the one who laughs and wants to take a picture when he goes headfirst into the toy box with his little legs sticking out into the air. All the while my husband is scolding me and rushing to his rescue - while I am rushing for the camera.
Maybe it's my coping mechanism, for dealing with all the toddler drama. Or maybe I'm just crustier and lack the sympathy gene. But I don't think it's the latter, because I melt into a puddle of emotional goo when he's getting shots or when he's sick or when I think about him enduring 7th grade. What I think is, parenting is often really hard, and toddlers are really demanding, and we have to get our laughs where we can, even if they are at that very toddler's expense now and then.
Comments
mommatocharlie (anonymous) says…
What a hoot! Sounds like a couple of neat parents
Clickker (anonymous) says…
Sounds a bit cruel.
Maybe the boy just doesnt like swimming. Ease up Mom.
meganstuke (Megan Stuke) says…
The boy loves swimming - he's well loved. We have a pool in our back yard and it's critical that he has the right life safety skills. Swimming lessons are not negotiable. Toddlers are funny. I'm very supportive of him and clap and soothe and encourage. But I still think his foibles are chuckle worthy.
talktobert (Lauren W) says…
I love you Stuke! You make me want to be a parent so much more than I already do!
booyalab (anonymous) says…
You sound like a cool mom. I think more parents should have that perspective about their kids' reactions. I know it's not PC to say, but not all emotion is equally valid. How will a kid learn to challenge himself if he isn't taught to face his fears?
LilySiebert (Lily Siebert) says…
The picture of that little screaming face is priceless. It's obvious from all of your posts that you are one well intentioned mom with a great sense of humor. My mom recently told me she sent me to my room during my meltdowns because she couldn't discipline me while she was laughing so hard. Your son is very lucky.
meganstuke (Megan Stuke) says…
LOL! Lily, your mom is smart!! We spend so much time stifling laughs when he's "expressing frustration" - it's terrible! He's so earnest! And funny!